wedding ring or engagement ring first

[LORITHECHICK]

:rolleyes: Okay, I have a general question, it really doesn't matter I suppose but...
on your ring finger does the wedding band/ring go on first and then the engagement ring...OR...do you keep the engagement ring there and then add the wedding band.

[hvacwife]

Your wedding band should go on first the engagement ring.

[chalytown]

Ring around the ...
If you've ever wondered why Americans put the wedding ring on the third finger of the left hand, it's because of an ancient Greek belief that a vein in this finger ran directly to the heart. And if you've ever groaned at having to buy both an engagement ring and a wedding ring, you can blame Pope Innocent III, who instituted a waiting period between engagement and marriage in the 13th century and also insisted that a ring be used in the wedding ceremony. Before that, rings were used to seal an engagement only (as well as other important agreements).

I found this for you, I hope that it might shed some light...

[Cpogie]

Yup, wedding band first, then the engagement ring, I guess it really doesn't matter, it should be whatever you feel comfortable with.

[LORITHECHICK]

Thanks Chalytown, interesting reading...
I was told when I got married to have the band on first but lately I've seen women with it the other way. This is another one for Miss Manners or Dear Heloise...

[mom363546]

Well I did my own thing. My engagement ( thats what I'm calling it)ring is a beatiful 1/2 c. ring you wear alone.So its going to my right hand.My wedding ring was my grandmothers we had reset in a new band keeping it the same style as she wore.that I will wear on my right hand.And... knowing me I may get tired of looking at that band and switch them around or wearing one of my other diamond rings as a wedding ring.I guess I don't think it matters to me what ring it is as long as theres one on the right hand ring finger.

[VanillaBean]

While we are on the subject of rings- I got engaged in May- and I have always heard that the engagement ring goes on the right hand until the "I do's"- then it goes upon the left for the " closest to your heart" similar to what someone else wrote. My soon to be mom-in-law has never heard of it- my own mother has- so I would like your opinion- or what you have heard/done? Please- I really do not want my mother-in-law to think I am a kook!!:eek: Has anyone else heard of the ring being worn on the right hand until you are married?

Thanks for your help

[Cpogie]

While we are on the subject of rings- I got engaged in May- and I have always heard that the engagement ring goes on the right hand until the "I do's"- then it goes upon the left for the " closest to your heart" similar to what someone else wrote. My soon to be mom-in-law has never heard of it- my own mother has- so I would like your opinion- or what you have heard/done? Please- I really do not want my mother-in-law to think I am a kook!!:eek: Has anyone else heard of the ring being worn on the right hand until you are married?

Thanks for your help

I was told and did this myself when I got married both times, lol, Ok, I have been married this time for 35 years, Yikes!! anyway the day of my wedding I placed the engagement ring on my right hand, when we were married I slipped the engagement ring on the left hand after the ceremony.

[VanillaBean]

What about which hand do you wear the engagement ring on during the "engagement"? I have always heard you wear it on your right hand until you say" I do" - then it goes on the left to be closer to your heart? I have been wearing mine on the right hand and when we say " I Do" he will place both(getting them sautered) on my left hand.

[Cpogie]

What about which hand do you wear the engagement ring on during the "engagement"? I have always heard you wear it on your right hand until you say" I do" - then it goes on the left to be closer to your heart? I have been wearing mine on the right hand and when we say " I Do" he will place both(getting them sautered) on my left hand.

I always wore it on my left hand, only placing it on my right hand the day we got married, then after the ceremony I slipped it back on my left hand. You are getting your soldered together, that is nice so they stay together!! Congrats to U, when is the big day??

[mom2fussbudgets]

I wore my engagement ring on my left hand until the wedding. Now, I wear the wedding ring first, and the engagement ring on top on my left hand. I've never heard of doing it any other way. But, I agree you should not be bound by tradition, and should wear your rings any way you like!

[wendav13]

I always wore it on my left hand, only placing it on my right hand the day we got married, then after the ceremony I slipped it back on my left hand. You are getting your soldered together, that is nice so they stay together!! Congrats to U, when is the big day??

I did the same thing when I got married. I was told that your wedding ring is supposed to be "closest to your heart", so I have always worn mine that way!

[LORITHECHICK]

I did the same as the other ladies, I've never heard of wearing it on the right hand until the "I do". I just think of it this way, people (men) usually look at the left hand to see if you're "taken", people (women) look at the left hand to see if you've "snagged" a man. LOL:D

[VanillaBean]

I appreciate all of the feedback from all of you and thank you all very much. I am choosing to wear mine on the right hand until our vows- which will be May 16th, 2008. Hopefully my Mom in law won't think I am a nutcase that her son fell in love with. LOL

And at least my own Mother has heard of it this way as well.

Thanks again to all who have helped me.

[Cpogie]

I appreciate all of the feedback from all of you and thank you all very much. I am choosing to wear mine on the right hand until our vows- which will be May 16th, 2008. Hopefully my Mom in law won't think I am a nutcase that her son fell in love with. LOL

And at least my own Mother has heard of it this way as well.

Thanks again to all who have helped me.

Good choice! and Congrats on your engagement and future wedding!

[VanillaBean]

Thanks a bunch Carol- we are excited and counting the days to our "I do's"!!!!:)

[Cpogie]

Thanks a bunch Carol- we are excited and counting the days to our "I do's"!!!!:)


Your Welcome!
Your getting married on a Friday? (May 16th) Is that is significant date you, the date you met?? Well you only have 299 days to go!!!

[VanillaBean]

That is the day that we became more than friends. It will be an easy date for him to remember as well..LOL..we went through all the months and May happened to be open(no b-days or anniversaries for us or family) with nothing going on so it was a great choice. I know it will be on a Friday- we plan to have a small private ceremony and then a couple months later have a huge reception for the whole gang!! This is my second marriage and his first- he isn't thrilled with churches and I have been there, done that ,so this time it is perfect.

[Cpogie]

That is the day that we became more than friends. It will be an easy date for him to remember as well..LOL..we went through all the months and May happened to be open(no b-days or anniversaries for us or family) with nothing going on so it was a great choice. I know it will be on a Friday- we plan to have a small private ceremony and then a couple months later have a huge reception for the whole gang!! This is my second marriage and his first- he isn't thrilled with churches and I have been there, done that ,so this time it is perfect.

I understand completely! When we were married (35) years ago we had both been married before... when we were way to young, lol gee, didn't we know everything?? lol anyways we decided just to go to Las Vegas and get married because we did not have alot of money.....It only cost $15.00 to get married at the court house, well at times I tell people look what I got for $15.00
Our date of marriage was the same as my mom and dad's March 18.

[sweety19]

I appreciate all of the feedback from all of you and thank you all very much. I am choosing to wear mine on the right hand until our vows- which will be May 16th, 2008. Hopefully my Mom in law won't think I am a nutcase that her son fell in love with. LOL

And at least my own Mother has heard of it this way as well.

Thanks again to all who have helped me.

Hey VanillaBean Congratulations for your engagement ..........

[VanillaBean]

Thank You Sweety

[Brbie]

I wore my engagement ring on my left till the morning of the wedding. Then the best man retrieved it and held it with my wedding band. When he handed the rings to the groom, he put both rings on my hand at the same time. I don't know about others but I would have to have my engagement ring re-sized had I worn it on my right, as that hand is bigger. The band was slipped on first then the engagement ring. I had always heard that when a woman turns her rings around, she seperated from her spouse. I guess those are old wives tales. :confused:

[caryn]

I appreciate all of the feedback from all of you and thank you all very much. I am choosing to wear mine on the right hand until our vows- which will be May 16th, 2008. Hopefully my Mom in law won't think I am a nutcase that her son fell in love with. LOL

And at least my own Mother has heard of it this way as well.

Thanks again to all who have helped me.

I think it is wonderful that you are making up your own mind about what to do. I had never heard to wear the engagement ring on the right hand. Only the left and my mother told me that you move the engagement ring to the right until after the weddind right before the ceremony. That is how I did it. I was neat to ready what others said as well. Thanks for the question and for allowing us to have input.

[teacheng1967]

Diamonds are my best friends. I have lots of them and wear them all. On my left hand, I have my wedding ring (diamonds on it) at the top of my hand, then comes my engagement ring (lots of diamonds on it) joining it. On my right hand I have my mother's wedding set of 21 diamonds. In my ears I have my diamond studs my stud of a hubby gave me just because I was his gal. No nose diamond or one hovering on my tummy button because the HOPE diamond is already taken and that's the one I'd wear on my tummy.:p

[lizmolik]

Diamonds are my best friends. I have lots of them and wear them all. On my left hand, I have my wedding ring (diamonds on it) at the top of my hand, then comes my engagement ring (lots of diamonds on it) joining it. On my right hand I have my mother's wedding set of 21 diamonds. In my ears I have my diamond studs my stud of a hubby gave me just because I was his gal. No nose diamond or one hovering on my tummy button because the HOPE diamond is already taken and that's the one I'd wear on my tummy.:p

Must be rich hunh? Must be nice!

[LisaRKR]

What about which hand do you wear the engagement ring on during the "engagement"? I have always heard you wear it on your right hand until you say" I do" - then it goes on the left to be closer to your heart? I have been wearing mine on the right hand and when we say " I Do" he will place both(getting them sautered) on my left hand.


STOP!!!!!! PLEASE tell me you haven't had them sautered together yet!!!!????!!!!

A great friend of mine owns her own Jewelry shop. She even makes much of it herself. She told me when I went to have mine sautered together NOT to because when you have them insured, it will decrease the value and they only insure one of them. God forbid you ever lose them, they will only give you replacement on one!

Now of course, laws in state are different. I would check with my insurance agent before I did anything.

[km090702]

When my husband and I were dating and the talks of marriage came up, I did some seriuos thinking about rings. I looked at thousands of woman's hands and noticed that if they were wearing 2 rings, one was off-centered and they were constantly fiddling with them to straighten them... So, I decided I wanted ONE ring after the wedding. We chose my wedding band together, which has a center stone and several smaller diamonds around it. We purchased it without the center stone. When he proposed, he gave me a solitare marquis on a plan gold band -- which I LOVED! A few weeks before the wedding, our jeweler set my solitare into my 'wedding band'. I have had so many compliments, I've stopped counting. My husband loved it because he wasn't left with the pressure of picking something, but he had the freedom to choose the solitare diamond on his own. And, I'm hapy because I have ONE ring ans a story to tell about it. :o)

[notyard]

My husband gave me a set of tri-color gold bands with beautiful roses in the bands--matching bands except one had a large centered diamond. I ordered a wide braid insert tri-color gold band for him from Australia a few weeks before the wedding (my fault--I wanted something to complement what he had for me and spent a very long time looking for the "perfect" ring), and it nearly didn't arrive in time due to the flight restrictions after the 9/11 attacks.

Turns out the set he gave me was borrowed from his mother from a marriage that never happened due to the fiancee's death. Every time I saw her, she commented if the diamond had turned to one side, or the roses weren't lined up, or I had just the wedding band on, or I wore it with the engagement ring on the bottom (like my husband wanted!), always something. After he lost his ring two years later (he has knobby knuckles and skinny fingers, so it had to be a little large due to the width of the band to make it past his knuckle), and we had a baby, I replaced both of our rings. I bought a very simple sterling silver band handcrafted by a Navajo artist with incised designs. The diamond on the original rose set stuck out rather far and I was always in fear of scratching the baby inadvertently, and I garden and tinker with tools a lot, so the simple Navajo band has worked out well. I replaced his lost band with a simple titanium comfort fit band that's a little narrower, so it can be smaller and still make it over his knuckle. If we lose either one, we're only out $40, not hundreds and thousands like the originals we started out with. The rose rings stay in the box, and we don't have to contend with comments on them any more.

[ladystrange]

I wore my engagement ring on my left hand, third finger. The day of the wedding, my best friend and matron of honour, wore it until after the ceremony. So I have the wedding band, engagement ring and an anniversary band on so I don't loose the engagement ring. It belong the the DH's grandmother and I'd be shot if something happened to it.:eek:

[teacheng1967]

Must be rich hunh? Must be nice!
No, not rich in money, but love. I've live a lot longer than you and have been married twice. Diamonds are an investment.

[mom363546]

No, not rich in money, but love. I've live a lot longer than you and have been married twice. Diamonds are an investment.


One of my dear friends hubby preferred her to buy gold and diamonds for her gifts. He always said it makes her happy and the price never goes down! I have to say she has aquired a rather nice collection over the years!

[lizmolik]

I am rich in love...I dont care if my fiancee buys me the cheapest ring there. It is more on the thought than anything. My ring came from Walmart I believe he got it on sale for under $100. I love it and wouldnt trade it for the world no diamond could compare to what he has already given me! I just think it is crazy for people to spend sooooo much money on things that dont matter. They cant take it with them when they die.

[mom363546]

no but you sure can enjoy it while you got it! I happen to like walmart diamonds and Jc pennies.Most of my rings are cheapies but I love those door buster sales my last christmas gift was a 1/2 carot before 9:00 am sale it was originaly over $300 he got it for $99. He makes them take all the rings on sale out so he can choose which diamonds look the best.Those $100 rings can be very special and look nice !!

[Cpogie]

I love diamonds too, and have a few diamond (wedding) rings sitting in my Jewelry cabinet....I prefer my Diamonique rings from QVC, they look like the real thing, clean like the real thing, and wear like the real thing, now don't get me wrong, nothing can compare to a nice diamond ring!!! it really doesn't matter where that ring comes from, what matters is if you like it and are happy with it.

[VanillaBean]

LMAO my ring is from WalMart and I am very honored that I have a ring period. Didn't care where it came from. It was the most thouhtful gesture Daniel ever did for me. (Daniel being my fiancé) We are taking his Mothers center diamond and puttin it into mine for our wedding. She gave us the whole ring- there are about 12 smaller diamonds in it and she said we can do whatever with them. We have decided to take 2 of them and put each in a band for my children(had them b4 him and I met) and they will get married with us. We are thinking of taking some of the others and putting them in a band for his wedding ring. Also Carol I love Diamonique too- my Grandma was a vivid watcher of QVC and swore by their jewelry. I have a pair of Diamonique earrings from her. :)

[Cpogie]

Oh yes, Diamonique Stud Earrings, I have 3 pair of them! I love them and they look real and set in 14K so who is the wiser?? lol
Grandma was very wise I can tell!!
Oh and best wishes for your wedding!!!!

[VanillaBean]

Thank You Carol- I am quite excited about it-Best of all- his mom likes me and my mom likes him. Never had that before!!!

[mom2fussbudgets]

Have any of you seen the movie "Blood Diamond" starring Leonardo DiCaprio? If so, you will never look at diamonds the same way again.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blood_Diamond_(film)

[Cpogie]

Have any of you seen the movie "Blood Diamond" starring Leonardo DiCaprio? If so, you will never look at diamonds the same way again.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blood_Diamond_(film)

I have not seen the movie, but I know about what goes on, that is horrible! I wonder why no one can stop that, I guess because Debeers owns everything and rules the diamond world.

[mom2fussbudgets]

The only way it will stop is if people stop buying diamonds, and I don't think that's going to happen!