Please pray for my friend

[dirtbikegrl]

I can not mention her real name so lets call her Hannah (God knows who i'm talking about) She is pregnant with her second child and is only 18! She is only engaged, has no money, lost her job, no car, and is worried about how to support the baby that she has and the one on the way. Please pray that things will get better. Today, I brought her a bag of canned food and 60 diapers and she started crying out of appreciation. I really feel bad but don't know how to help her and her family. My mom would be p/o if she found out I am buying stuff for the baby and her (even though it is diapers and food). Please pray that it will all work out and also for all the teenage drama that teenagers, like me, have to go through because life can be really tough for a teen, especially if the teen is Christian and trying to do the right thing.

[utkd29]

Sneding prayers for your friend. Life is tough sometimes, but it will make her stronger in the end. Hopefully she will find a job soon, and things will start looking better for her!

[SSIAnkie]

I will say a prayer for your friend and her family. Life is hard, but you learn from it. Hopefully things will start looking up for her soon!

[dirtbikegrl]

Thanks, I hope things get better too

[mood4amelody]

I can not mention her real name so lets call her Hannah (God knows who i'm talking about) She is pregnant with her second child and is only 18! She is only engaged, has no money, lost her job, no car, and is worried about how to support the baby that she has and the one on the way. Please pray that things will get better. Today, I brought her a bag of canned food and 60 diapers and she started crying out of appreciation. I really feel bad but don't know how to help her and her family. My mom would be p/o if she found out I am buying stuff for the baby and her (even though it is diapers and food). Please pray that it will all work out and also for all the teenage drama that teenagers, like me, have to go through because life can be really tough for a teen, especially if the teen is Christian and trying to do the right thing.

There are so many things scrambling around in my head about this. I hope I get the right ones and the ones that will be helpful out to you. :o I have so many questions but I guess the bottom line as far as answers to my questions is that this girl, "Hannah" has dug herself a deep hole and forgot to bring rope, right? This teenage drama is nothing new, sweetie. It's been going on since the 80's, and that's why we have so many totally screwed up young adults in this world now. Don't think me harsh or think that I don't understand what it's like. I was pregnant when I graduated High School. I've been thru too many times rinsing out cloth diapers (that's what she needs for back up when there's no money), weeks of eating nothing but Malt O' Meal so my baby had plenty of food to last, camping with 4 kids because we didn't have a home, etc, etc, ad nauseum. I've been there, I know it, I lived it and then some.

Are you guys close enough friends that you can really give her both barrels? She needs to step up and be responsible. What birth control is she going to use after the new baby gets here? She should have a firm idea about that 'cause she isn't planning on giving up her *** life, is she? "I wanted to 'get some' is just not an acceptible excuse for being pregnant. :(
When she decided to keep that first baby, she silently made a pact by the action of keeping it with that child, with God, and with the world that she would better able to take care and provide for that baby than anyone else. She needs to look at life as though she should have to earn the right to raise those babies. If those kids are going to be better off with her than if she put them up for adoption, she better get her butt moving pretty quick.

She's surely eligible for welfare if she isn't currently on it. That will pay the expenses for the birth, give them a bit of money and plenty of food. There is also the WIC program that will give vouchers for formula, milk, cereal, cheese, and whatever else they do.

Does she get support from the father(s)? If not, welfare will go after them for a small fee (here in IA anyways, it's $10) and get a support order in place for her.

If she gets a job, welfare will provide for daycare even if you don't get a welfare check but are low income. They will also know of ways for her to get her G.E.D. if she wasn't able to graduate. If she isn't able to find work right away, then she should also be able to get Pell Grants to go to a community college, so that her chances of getting a half way decent job improve. (The daycare from welfare applies to school as well as work.) With the Pell Grant, if she takes the 12 full time each sememster, it should be plenty to cover the tuition, plus another $700 - $1000 left over.

For right now tho, does she have a home she isn't worried about losing or getting kicked out of? She should be grateful if she does, 'cause that is a sense of security that you don't appreciate on a daily basis. Her situation and her pregnancies have probably evolved out of a long standing case of low self-esteem for whatever reasons. She needs a boost in her spirit. Watch her and point out her good qualities often. Actually, you should do that with everyone you know. It's a lot nicer to be around happy people and it's even better to be a small part of what makes them that way. :) Happiness can heal a wounded soul.

Do you have a women's shelter in your area? They would probably be a good source of supportive agencies that might be able to help her with things like food, clothes, counseling, job counseling, and whatnot.

That's all I got right now. But, sweetie, if she wants to raise strong, healthy, and loving children, she's going to make it. She'll fight the world and make it. It's all in her hands. She created all this and she has to own it.

Man, I hope I didn't sound hateful and mean, 'cause that's nowhere near what I'm feeling. I just want to hug that poor kid and shake some sense in her, at the same time. I hope some of the stuff in here helps out.

[bunny]

nope not hateful or any of that bad stuff. just truthful and that is something people all to often don't do and should. Life isn't sugar coated and never will be .

[MandMnmbr3]

Dirtbikegrl... you shouldn't be reprimanded for helping out your friend.

BUT... I agree with Lynne, with one exception, teenage drama has been going on since the 60's!

"Hannah" needs to take responsibility for her actions. Does she have family who will help her out? What about her Church if she attends? You mentioned she is engaged, does her fiance work?

Hugs,
Mae